B"H

Thursday, Mar-Cheshvan 23, 5783 (Hakhel Year) / November 17, 2022

This week’s Parsha, Chayei Sarah, relates in great detail how Abraham sends his servant Eliezer to find a wife for his son Yitzchak (Isaac). This is the first time the Torah mentions in great detail how a match came about.

Q.What is the origin of the custom to cover the bride’s face with a veil before going to the Chupah (canopy)?

A.The source for this custom is in this week’s Parsha. The Torah relates that when Eliezer brought Rivkah back with him as a wife for Yitzchak and she first saw her future husband, “She took her veil and covered herself.” This is why the bride’s face is covered before entering the marriage ceremony.

Q.   Why do many have the canopy (Chupah) outside, or indoors under an open skylight?

A.   This is to invoke on the couple G-d’s blessing to Abraham, “Your children shall be like the stars of heaven.”

Q.   Why is the bridegroom led to the Chupah before the bride?

A.   Many of the customs of the wedding ceremony are connected to the Giving of the Torah on Mount Sinai.  The giving of the Torah is compared to a wedding ceremony. At the Giving of the Torah, G-d betrothed the Jewish people as his people through the Torah.  At Mount Sinai G-d came first and waited for the Jewish people to arrive.  Thus, at the wedding ceremony, the groom comes first under the canopy and waits for the bride to arrive. 

Q.   Why does the wedding ring have to be a plain gold band without precious stones in it?

A.  Because the precious stones may mislead the bride as to the actual value of the ring.  A ring accepted under a mistaken impression would invalidate the legal sanctification for which the ring was intended.  If the bribe is misled about the value of the ring, then the marriage is not valid.

Q.  Why is the ring placed on the forefinger of the bride’s right hand?

A.  One of the reasons it is placed on the index finger is because it points easily, thus she can readily display the ring for the two witnesses to see.

Q.  Why does the bridegroom break a glass at the end of the Chupah ceremony?

A.  To remember the destruction of the Holy Temple. To impress upon everyone that no ceremony can be complete as long as the Holy Temple is not rebuilt.          

HAVE A VERY GOOD, HAPPY, HEALTHY AND SUCCESSFUL DAY

B"H

Monday, Mar-Cheshvan 27, 5783 (Hakhel Year) / November 21, 2022

I begin with thanks and praise to Hashem for His blessing of our newest granddaughter. May we all be blessed with many simchas and much Nachas from our children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

Last week’s Parsha, Chayei Sarah, begins with the passing of Sarah at the age of 127, and ends with the passing of Abraham at the age of 175.  In between, the Torah tells us in great detail how, after Sarah’s passing, Abraham sends his most trusted servant, Eliezer, to go back to Abraham’s birthplace and choose a wife for Yitzchak from Abraham’s family.  Yitzchak was 37 years at that time. 

We read about Eliezer’s travels; about the qualities he was looking for in the girl whom he would choose to marry Yitzchak.  He finds Rivkah who fits every aspect he was looking for.  She was kind to him and his people, she offered them water and for their camels.  The Torah describes the presents he gave her and the negotiations he conducted with her family to let Rivkah go back with him to marry Yitzchak.

When Eliezer returns with Rivkah and introduces her to Yitzchak, the Torah tells us, “And Yitzchak brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and Yitzchak took Rivkah and she became his wife and he loved her. With Rivkah, Yitzchak was comforted for the loss of his mother.”

Q.  What’s the connection between Yitzchak bringing Rivkah into his mother’s tent and marrying her?

A. Our sages explain that his mother, Sarah, was so righteous that three special miracles were associated with her. 1) The candles she lit before Shabbat would miraculously burn all week until next Friday afternoon, when she would light the candles again in honor of Shabbat.  2) There was a special blessing in the bread she baked;3) A special cloud hovered constantly over her tent. 

When Sarah passed away these three miracles were gone.  Before marrying Rivkah, Yitzchak wanted to see if she was as righteous as his mother.  Thus, he brought Rivkah into his mother’s tent.  When he saw that the three miracles returned, he married her and loved her.

King Solomon says in the Aishet Chayil (Women of Valor), recited Friday night before Kiddush: “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is vain; a G-d fearing woman is the one to be praised!”

After being told by Eliezer about her kindness, Yitzchak also wanted to see the level of her righteousness.  When he was assured that she was as righteous as his mother, he married her and he loved her. This may be the secret recipe for a happy life and a successful marriage. A marriage based on true love; a love which is based on foundations of kindness and righteousness has a much better chance to succeed.

Q.   How many children did Abraham have?

A.    In addition to his two famous sons, Ishmael and Yitzchak (Isaac), Abraham had six more sons.  Their names were: Zimron; Yokshon; Medan; Midyan; Yishbok; Shuach (see genesis 25:1).  According to an opinion in the Talmud, he also had a daughter named Bakol.

HAVE A VERY GOOD, HAPPY, HEALTHY AND SUCCESSFUL DAY

B"H

Wednesday, Mar-Cheshvan 29, 5783 (Hakhel Year) / November 23, 2022

The birth of a child brings joy to the family, especially to a couple who didn’t have children for twenty years after their marriage.  In this week’s Parsha, Toldot, we read about such a couple. The Torah tells us the story of Rivkah and Yitzchak, who didn’t have children until twenty years after their marriage.  Yet, when Rivkah finally became pregnant, her pregnancy brought her great distress.

The Torah gives the following account: “Yitzchak prayed repeatedly to G-d opposite his wife (i.e., they both prayed) because she was barren.  G-d accepted his prayer and his wife, Rivkah, conceived.”

The Torah continues, “The children struggled inside her.  She said, if the pain of pregnancy is so difficult, why do I want to be like this?” She decided to go to Shem, son of Noah, who was the sage at that time, to inquire why her pregnancy was so much more difficult compared to other women.

G-d told her through Shem, “Two esteemed individuals are in your womb. Two kingdoms will separate from you. One kingdom will be mightier than the other, when one rises the other will fall and the elder son will serve the younger son.” Upon hearing that she was carrying twins, she felt better.

Q.   What were the struggles in her womb all about?  Why, when Shem told her that she was carrying twins, although the struggles within her didn’t stop, she already felt better?

A.   The sages explain that when Rivkah would pass the Study Halls of Shem, (where Torah was studied even before it was given to everyone at Mount Sinai – See Genesis 26, 5, that Abraham studied Torah), she felt the child struggling to get there.  But when she went by a house of Idol worship, she felt the same thing all over again. This caused her great distress and pain.  

Her fear was that the child she was carrying was one with a dual personality.  One who is confused and cannot distinguish right from wrong.  When she goes by a Torah center, he wants to go join there and when passing a place of idol worship, he runs for that.  However, when she heard that she was carrying twins and it was not the same child who wishes to go to both places, rather one wants to serve G-d and it’s the other one wants to worship idols, she felt much better. 

When the Jewish people were wavering between serving G-d and idols, Elijah the prophet admonished them, “How long will you waver.  How long will you jump from one to the other?” 

Elijah told them to make up their mind one way or another.  He was going to prove to them that G-d was the true G-d.  But serving the two is neither here nor there. Confusion is the worst thing. A mistake can be corrected when recognized, but confusion is very difficult to fix. Thus, when Rivkah realized that she was carrying twins and each of the children she was carrying had a clear vision of their future world, she felt better. It gave her hope that in time even the child who now gravitates toward idols will recognize his mistake and repent.

HAVE A VERY GOOD, HAPPY, HEALTHY AND SUCCESSFUL DAY